Friday, February 8, 2013

My Evil Cat

For as long as I can remember, I've always wanted a kitten. Not a cat, but a kitten, with fuzz instead of fur, still small and cute. I've been wishing and hoping for so long that I've slowly but surly gone down from wishing for an adorable kitty to anything that responds to being called by its name - that's not humans. We already have enough of those at home, the humans, I mean. Anyway, a dear friend of mine had gotten a kitten, and so I was always over her house, paying more attention to the kitten than the friend. This particular friend lives in an apartment, and so as the kitten started to grow, her hair would fall off, leaving the apartment covered in cat hair. She knew I wanted the cat, and asked me if I would like to keep it. Of course, I agreed. There was a small problem, though. My mother has sworn off cats - actually, she's sworn off all animals, because she already has her hands full with all of us human responsibilities, and so there's no space for animal responsibilities. Countless times, I've tried to convince her that I would be the one to take care of the cat, and she's already potty-trained, and you won't even realize she exists. But my mother stuck to her words and refused to let any animal step inside her house. Yet, if you can recall, I accepted my friend's cat without any hesitation - no "let me check", or "I have to ask my mom". Nope. Just "yes, yes, I promise I'll take good care of the cat, just please, gimme her already!". I'll fast-forward and save you the gory parts, but long story short, my mother was angry. Like, fuming-so-bad-you-could-see-the-steam-coming-out-of-her-ears-and-her-eyes-nearly-popping-out mad. But in the end, we have a garden, and so there are probably some mice in that garden, and so I had done a small deed and brought home a mouse catcher. We call the cat Tita, mainly because that's what my friend named her, and so that's what she responds to. Anyway, at first it was all rainbows and cupcakes, and Tita dug up little holes in the dirt to do her potty, and covered them back up, and wasn't too picky with what she ate, and was always energetic and playful. But see, I only thought she was the perfect cat. She never caught any mice (well, maybe we don't have any after all), and instead used the jasmine plant as a scratch toy, resulting in no plant at all, and sticks strewn all around the garden. We also have chickens, and so Tita loves to play chicken-chasing, and I bet those chickens have chronic stress or something, always worried about the cat sneaking up behind you and pouncing. Luckily, Tita just has a messed up sense of what's fun and what's not, and co two millimeters away from the chicken, she turns and runs away. Tita also loves to chase toes. If this were a cartoon, like the Tom and Jerry ones, every time Tita glimpses toes, she sees 5 piggies or fishes or whatever food cats dream of. And throughout all of her mad endeavors, I still thought she was an innocent cat, simply trying to play. But then my trusty came came into the picture - no pun intended - and cleared up all my misgivings. My cat is a demented devil. I've tried taking photos of her from every angles, and her eyes are always green. Eyes caught in flash are usually red, but since she's a devil in hiding, she knows red eyes are a definite giveaway, and so she lets her eyes twinkle green whenever I fire the camera flash. that's it. Tita's up for adoption. But Beware! She will infiltrate our house, and act like the whole house is hers, until you are but a mere servant shining her toenails.