Saturday, June 15, 2013

The Hike

No, I did not capitalize The Hike simply because it is the title. Well, that's part of it, but The Hike is the kind of things that simply needs to be capitalized. Also, it makes it sound much more important. Now the purpose of this post is essentially to brag and complain, but you might find really helpful tidbits of information here and there.
I hate exercise. Now, of course, I'd never openly admit it, but I really do not like exercising. And so even though I'm not some fat couch potato, summer's just begun, and I was fully planning on reading and sleeping and eating the whole summer. In other words, I had accepted the fact that by the end of summer, I'd probably have to be rolled through a doorway. Luckily, I have father dearest. It wouldn't hurt to mention that my father has a very prominent athletic gene, which I did not inherit, of course, and loves hiking and rock climbing and jumping from airplanes. I'm still afraid to ride on roller coasters. My father insists that we should go hiking at least once a week, but we end up going every other day. Usually, it's a short 2-3 mile hike, but believe me, when you hiking up the steepest incline you've ever had to experience, 2 miles is a long way. On Saturdays, we hike the hike, going for 5-6 miles (don't forget, this is through horrible terrain. Daddy, though, is allergic to flat terrain.) Today my father promised to take us to a great hiking place, where there were even waterfalls, and people came all the way from other states to hike there. Admission to the hiking trail/forest was $10. That in itself should have been a warning sign. Who pays $10 to be allowed to walk through a forest?
This hiking park is about an hour away from our house, and the parking places fill up pretty quickly, so we woke up and were out of the house around 6:30. AM. As in the sun had just risen. Of course, I almost didn't wake up, being as tired as I was, since I'd stayed up 'till 2 AM finishing a book. I was tired and bleary eyed, so I put on some comfy clothes and wobbled to the car. No breakfast, Of course, the entire rest of the family had woken up at 5 in the morning and ate eggs and oatmeal and cereal and milk - basically, they had a feast. I was snoring.
We arrived at the trail park at exactly 7:28. I'd finished sleeping in the car, so I also got to the trail park tired and bleary eyed. Thankfully, I'd somehow remembered to brush my teeth at home, which was kind of surprising when I woke up the second time. We started walking. Just like that - one second it's the car, the next it's the trail and giant redwoods on every side. There were a bunch of trail endings or beginnings - it's kind of hard to know which one is the start and which the finish when it's just a slightly cleared, semi-trodden path in the middle of a forest. We randomly chose one and started to walk. Up a hill, down a hill, up a mountain, up another hill. Usually, trails connect, so you can start off on any trail and end up in whichever you want. The trail we took was a trail surrounded by redwoods on every side. No sign of a connected trail. So we walked. And walked. And walked. We drank some water. We drank some VitaminWater. No more water. No more VitaminWater. We ran. We jogged. Oh, look, a waterfall! Too tired to care. We sat down in the middle of the god forsaken path. We got up and walked some more. We cried. We laughed. We tripped. Specifically, I tripped on a tree root, and fell on my but. Right now, a have a huge bruise spanning my entire but. My tailbone hurts. Thankfully, we had my father's iPhone, which had a hiking app that calculated how far we walked. (No connection, though. We couldn't even call for help.) We were moving at a pace of 25 min/mile according to the phone. 4 miles. 5 miles. 6 miles. 7 miles. 7.2 miles. 7.8 miles. 10 miles. 11. 12. Numbers no longer make sense. The iPhone's battery went dead. WE felt the same. Thirsty. Parched. Hungry. I had no breakfast. We walked and waked and walked, and there aren't even any people, as if we were the only people to take that trail. And then at the end, when I was wobbling and cross eyes and sweaty, we saw a huge sign facing the opposite way. Attention! it said. Proffesional trail. Strenuous. 6 hours long. (Of course, it took us more. I mean, it wold take professionals 6 hours)
We had entered the trail from the wrong way. The warning we should have seen BEFORE starting the trail - the 6 hour trail - we only saw after we finished it.
We finished the trail at 2:30. We arrived home at 3:30. I fell asleep, exhausted and worn out, after eating sandwiches my father treated us to, at 4:15. I woke up at 8:20 (like, sunset). Right now, it's 9:15 PM. 
Next time, I'm going to hike through the neighborhood.